hey, i think you might just be unlucky
Most of us use SDC (stardock central) the one you used to download the game, find the chat and connect. Once your connected type in /join #sins
That will bring you to the sins chat channel with alot more ppl all the time
ive seen this alot, even on IRC, ppl are looking for other to play with but are on different timezones so its hard for some to get a online game going.
I just hope Ironclad and Stardock is looking into some kind of a solution for this