A phone call from a friend to tell me the North Star is in love with me. "I'm not gay" he says over and over again, and I feel the unwanted anticipation of an impeding relationship. The horrible fear of feeling vulnerable again, the fear of having a bu who loves me for me. Not having to deal with racial slurs and entering a relationship where I can feel real love and not some fucked up version of someones baggage being played over and over again.
Lord give me the strenght to not hurt the people that love me. Lord give me the strenght to cherish those that cherish me. Lord give me the strenght to not turn to you when I feel vulnerable. The North Star and the Water should/could be mine.
I'm not fucking gay.
I'm not fucking gay.
He has to quit that shit before he wants me.
But he already fucking does......lol
