I Can't Believe She Was Me

from JoeUser Forums
How could you live up to someone like that?
How could you stand the glare
Of the constant sunlight blinding
Taking up everything
And leaving room for none
I can't believe she was me
She is so beautiful
Even I can't live up to that
Even I am blinded in her light

My skin does not glow so
anymore
My teeth are not perfect & white
anymore
My hair is not golden
anymore
My eyes are not so bright
anymore
She is like the sun
And I am a grey cloud

She is happy!
People like her want-her desire-her-love-her
I do too
Who wouldn't?

Isn't it funny how I've eclipsed myself
I can't even live up to
The standards I once surpassed
Thank god she's in the past
Who wouldn't be jealous of her?
Even I am jealous of that
Even I want to be just like her

So where do I find confidence?
That and a few million pounds
are our only differences...
How do I see that face
And then see mine
And not just want to KILL myself?
If I didn't know she was me,
I'd hate her in an instant
Maybe I still do.
art
309 views 5 replies
Reply #1 from JoeUser Forums Top
Interesting...I really like this. I think there are some spots that could use a little work but over all I think this is good, interesting, and not obvious--(which is good in poetry I'm told. )
Reply #2 from JoeUser Forums Top
You think there are some spots that need some work?

Don't bother telling me what they are, I write poetry about how I feel. I'm glad you kind of liked I guess, though.
Galactic Civilizations IV
Reply #3 from JoeUser Forums Top
nice work tangled wishes, self-analysis is WAY underrated and underused...except in us self-loathing poets of course...but we already know we're morally superior to everyone else.
Reply #4 from JoeUser Forums Top
Lol, man I am so mean sometimes, and that comment i made was TERRIBLE. Thank you very much Suspeckted, fellow minnesotan, right? Don't we know though?

And Sarah, sorry I came off all nasty and evil, sometimes I'm not very welcoming to criticism. I'm glad that you liked it. I wish that if you were to critique it (or analyze as I like to think literary peoples do when reading poetry) you would've gotten more in depth, though! What did you like! What did you think some things meant, what confused you, how did it make you feel!!!

Lol, hysterical again.

~TW
Reply #5 from JoeUser Forums Top
Fellow Minnesotan indeed! Viva La Minnesota!

Hope you enjoyed the global warming.

-Suspeckted