Why did the chicken cross the road?..... 
depends who you ask...... 
Aristotle
To actualize its potential.
The Bible
And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." And the Chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.
Moses
Know ye that it is unclean to eat the chicken that has crossed the road, and that the chicken that crosseth the road doth so for its own preservation.
Pat Buchanan
To steal a job from a decent, hard-working American.
Albert Camus
It doesn't matter; the chicken's actions have no meaning except to him.
Julius Caesar
To come, to see, to conquer.
Rene Descartes
It had sufficient reason to believe it was dreaming anyway.
Bob Dylan
How many roads must one chicken cross?
Dr. Seuss
Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes! The chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed, I've not been told!
Bill Gates
I have just released Chicken XP, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your check book — and Explorer is an inextricable part of the operating system.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
It didn't cross the road, it transcended it.
Grandpa
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.
Richard M. Nixon
The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the chicken did not cross the road. I don't know any chickens. I have never known any chickens.
Gerald R. Ford It probably fell from an airplane and couldn't stop its forward momentum.
Plato For the greater good.
Karl Marx
It was a historical inevitability.
Nietzsche
Because if you gaze too long across the Road, the Road gazes also across you.
Oliver North
National Security was at stake.
Carl Jung
The confluence of events in the cultural gestalt necessitated that individual chickens cross roads at this historical juncture, and therefore synchronicitously brought such occurrences into being.
Albert Einstein
Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road crossed the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.
David Hume
Out of custom and habit.
Mark Twain
The news of its crossing has been greatly exaggerated.
Captain James T. Kirk
To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
Mr. Scott
'Cos ma wee transporter beam was na functioning properly. Ah canna work miracles, Captain!
Robert Frost
To cross the road less traveled by.
Gilligan
The traffic started getting rough the chicken had to cross. If not for the plumage of its peerless tail the chicken would be lost, the chicken would be lost!
Werner Heisenberg
We are not sure which side of the road the chicken was on, but it was moving very fast.
Martin Luther King
I dreamt of a world where all chickens were free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.
Stan Laurel
I'm sorry, Ollie. It escaped when I opened the run.
Groucho Marx Chicken? What's all this talk about chicken? Why, I had an uncle who thought he was a chicken. My aunt almost divorced him, but we needed the eggs.
Gregor Mendel
To get various strains of roads.
Sir Isaac Newton
Chickens at rest tend to stay at rest. Chickens in motion tend to cross the road.
Wolfgang Pauli
There already was a chicken on the other side of the road.
William Shakespeare
I don't know why, but methinks without much ado.
Mr. T
If you saw me coming you'd cross the road too!
George Washington
Actually it crossed the Delaware with me back in 1776. But most history books don't reveal that I bunked with a birdie during the duration.
William Wordsworth
To have something to recollect in tranquility.
Henny Youngman
Take this chicken... please.
Business Consultant
Deregulation of the chicken's side of the road was threatening its dominant market position. The chicken was faced with significant challenges to create and develop the competencies required for the newly competitive market. We have, in a partnering relationship with the client, helped the chicken by rethinking its physical distribution strategy and implementation processes. Using the Poultry Integration Model (PIM), we helped the chicken use its skills, methodologies, knowledge capital and experiences to align the chicken's people, processes and technology in support of its overall strategy within a Program Management framework. Careful study of a diverse cross-spectrum of road analysts and the best chickens along with our consultants with deep skills in the transportation industry, led to a two-day itinerary of meetings in order to leverage all party's personal knowledge capital, both tacit and explicit, and to enable them to synergize with each other in order to achieve the implicit goals of delivering and successfully architecting and implementing an enterprise-wide value framework across the continuum of poultry cross-median processes. The meeting was held in a park-like setting enabling and creating an impactful environment which was strategically based, industry-focused, and built upon a consistent, clear, and unified market message and aligned with the chicken's mission, vision, and core values. This was conducive towards the creation of a total business integration solution. Therefore, we have helped the chicken change to become more successful in its road-crossing endeavours.
This post was bought to you from a particularly spiffy looking desktop this morning.... 
