Banned for wearing skinny jeans with deliberately ripped knees, a pink crop top and looking for that which is now believed to be extinct.

Banned for gray matter that jiggles every time someone goes achoo.

banned for losing it in a sneezing match

Banned for doing the sleazy sneezely during din din with the cap'n.

Banned for the two minute coughing fit during the one minute silence honouring a fallen comrade at the football.

Banned for not finishing the football. (Pitch, field, Rugby, American football, Soccer...which pitch is a field that has goal posts that look like nets with red lights on them).

banned for mixing metaphors 

Banned for confusing Uvah with somebody who actually gives a stuff about mixing shit up.

Banned for giving away my platform on mixin' stuff to resemble coherent thought.

banned by the platforms of the sea

Banned on top by the ocean bottoms in winter time.

banned for letting the iceberg sink your ship and not letting jack on to the door that clearly has enough space

Banned for undermining serious chit-chats among us 'normal' peeps.

Banned for assumptions regarding normal peeps.... and speak for your self, cos not everyone who's normal is actually 'normal'

banned for misplacing words

Banned for misplacing your 'normal' for the other kind... the one that has an AB in front of it

Banned for returning with alphabet soup.

Banned for fishing the letters out of your alphabet soup to create a naughty note to your elected official that'd confound handwriting experts.

banned for not realizing how easy that is with our current selection of elected officials

Banned for hitting the nail on the noggin. 'Pour' over that.

banned for nailing the pore spoon

banned for nailing the pore spoon

Banned for spooning with your teddy bear.

banned for mocking the nickname I give my wife

Banned for spooning out of season.