loukeeya

Reply to forgivness in Community WinCustomize Forums

thanx guys, starkers my heart goes out to u too i know how awful these ordeals are. as for this man i have no idea if he is in custody or still loose. the police wont tell me anything other than to say they know where he is and he is settled. i know there are ppl suffering far worse than me at the min, i just cant seem to re focus and look beyond this. my friends have been great but its difficult for them too, my ex bf from that time is still devastated and his life was f----d

Reply to forgivness in Community WinCustomize Forums

guys i am really struggling, i know its the past but its been with me every day of the past 20 yrs. i keep reliving it over and over and yes the diazepam has helped, i dont have the courage to take my own life, am far too weak but it does worry me that i am even thinking of it. its prob coz i really need some peace. my logical brain tells me its ok he is not gonna hurt me and my emotional brain tells me he is gonna hurt and humiliate me. i dont know if he is in prison, on bail or anything-i d

Reply to forgivness in Community WinCustomize Forums

well i have to be honest the last couple of days have been tough, have been so close to just ending it. i cant even cycle now coz am so distracted i keep veering in the middle of the road. i spent several hours sitting in my bath with a razor blade and couldnt find the courage to do it. god knows am trying to be strong but i just cant. the thought of the trial is bad enough, having to be moved with a new identity away from my friends is not helping. its ironic that in the 21st century t

Reply to forgivness in Community WinCustomize Forums

well today i saw victim support, they were so nice. they will be with me from start to finish. they did warn me that it could take a few months to come to trial coz there are other victims. it doesnt bear thinking about but i know i will find the strength when i most need it i have been shown so much kindness, i am not used to kindness and its quite strange but it has made a huge difference. i am not gonna comment anymore til its over but i thankyou all from the bottom of my hea

Reply to forgivness in Community WinCustomize Forums

your right wizard, 20 yrs ago the police dealing with me said there had been 20 other rapes, one poor lady was murdered. i will persue it for them and for me. thankyou all for giving me hope, i know this isnt easy to hear about or read about but i do thankyou all for the comfort you have given me

Reply to forgivness in Community WinCustomize Forums

am not sure wether to laugh or cry, that laughing yoga was just too much. surely he isnt for real? lol makes me look like the most sane normal person on the planet [e digicons]:grin:[/e] but thanxs syd i appreciate that gesture - so far so good today have only cried twice, its a start

Reply to forgivness in Community WinCustomize Forums

i have to say you have all shown me that there is so much goodness and kindness in ppl, i have always known in my heart that there were many good ppl - i just happened to cross paths with one of lifes not so nice ppl. you have all given me strength and i value each and every one of you. today i woke up feeling calmer and stronger, i am hoping that the initial shock has passed and that now i can move forward with strength. a big part of me felt guilty for bringing this here but i hope

Reply to forgivness in Community WinCustomize Forums

i know i will find the strength from somewhere to get thru this, i do have some good friends. i cant have them in court tho, i couldnt bear them having to listen to the details. i have been trying to get angry, i just cant its not the person i am. i also feel so sad for his family, they are innocent but also are going to suffer. i have always lived my life in a way not to harm anyone, i hate even using harsh words. life changing it has been, even now i cant have a knife in my flat-i use a spo

Reply to forgivness in Community WinCustomize Forums

lol u have put a smile on my face-the idea of kicking ass is funny. i am far too gentle a person to harm anyone, even this vile man, but i can dream. frankie the police have arranged counselling and am meeting my liason officer who will be with me throughout this ordeal. i know i will get thru it its just so raw at the moment even tho it was 20 yrs ago, i have my 2 cats for comfort and a few good friends so i wont be destroyed a 2nd time. [e digicons]<3[/e] [e d

Reply to forgivness in Community WinCustomize Forums

i am so overwhelmed by your kind words, am hoping i can find some inner strength. its strange coz my friends have always admired my strength, i never saw myself as strong i just always picked myself up and got on with life. i will see it thru no matter the cost coz its the right thing to do and i dont want another 20 yrs of pain. medication is never the answer i know but at the moment i am alone and distraught and if it keeps me safe thats the main thing. its for a couple of days

Reply to forgivness in Community WinCustomize Forums

thankyou so much - i have always thought i was a strong person, kind and compassionate but this is so hard. this man ruined my life, it wasnt just the act and the torture it was that he destroyed me as a person. before it i was happy carefree, after i couldnt be on my own for many yrs. i took every drug i cld to blank it out, it didnt and yes the bit of therapy helped. yet here i am back in that hideous dark painfuil place shaking and terrified. i need to see it thru coz i know there were oth

forgivness in Community WinCustomize Forums

yesterday i had a visit from the cold case police informing me that they had a suspect and want me to go to court and try and get a conviction. 20 yrs ago a stranger broke into my flat raped and tortured me at knifepoint and then hounded me day and night for 7 months trying to get in and kill me. i had police come but he was never caught. now they have found him due to new dna techniques. i have never been so distraught in my life and was on the floor shaking and sobbing, it was as if

Reply to Reported Attack Page in Forum Issues WinCustomize Forums

oh i had this attack page, when i pressed ignore it took me to mozilla malware warning site. well have turned off warnings and now can access forums [e digicons]:grin:[/e]

Reply to can i use an image as background in Fences WinCustomize Forums

true - i like the idea of a transparent image. maybe someone will update fences so we can [e digicons]:grin:[/e]

can i use an image as background in Fences WinCustomize Forums

can i use an image as a background for my fences? i know i can choose a colour but it wld be nice to have seperate images for each fence [e digicons]:grin:[/e]

Reply to just a question about partitions in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

lol jafo, i do store my video art and pics on an external drive i just dont back up stuff on the pc. i think am weird coz i quite enjoy re installing when my pc has a hissy fit lol handy recovery is fine for recovering bits tho [e digicons]:grin:[/e]

Reply to referrals in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

ok am gonna be brave and read frogboys article, have to confess to not being good with instructions lol i downloaded terragen and refuse to read how it works-maybe i could get a referral........ [e digicons]:rofl:[/e] [e digicons]:rofl:[/e] [e digicons]:rofl:[/e]

referrals in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

i know am going to sound dim but what is a referral? who is referring what and where? [e digicons]:S[/e]

Reply to just a question about partitions in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

yes jafo, tho i have to say i never back up coz in the past when i have and then tried to get it back it doesnt seem to deliver. now i have handy recovery which will find all my stuff if i need to format the drive [e digicons]:grin:[/e]

Reply to just a question about partitions in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

thanx guys, have spent most of the afternoon moving files. mainly vid stuff so took for ever lol

just a question about partitions in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

i have a 500gb hdd partitioned into 2 seperate drives, i have stuff on both. what happens if i remove the partition and revert to a single 500gb drive? will i loose my stuff? [e digicons]:grin:[/e]

Reply to Windows7 32bit in WindowBlinds WinCustomize Forums

ooooooooooooooops i dont know why i panicked, its installed fine. not sure what i did wrong first time round. silly me [e digicons]8C[/e]

Windows7 32bit in WindowBlinds WinCustomize Forums

i have just installed impulse on my netbook which has windows7 32 bit installed-when i tried ti install windowblinds it says not compatable with OS - is this correct?

Reply to Diagnostic software in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

well folks....good news, the pc running a treat now its been severely hoovered!! nice cool air coming out and no shut downs....YIPPEEEEEEEE [e digicons]:rofl:[/e]

Reply to Diagnostic software in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

lol am not making any comments [e digicons]:rofl:[/e]